Ahh, the joys of days off...

So as I sit here in silence (rare for me to do, I tend to like noise) I feel like things are starting to fall into place.  As you know moving takes FOREVER to get settled in to a new house.  You have to find new niches for everything.  You try it one way, and realize it totally doesn't work having it there, and you rearrange it multiple times before you settle on it's permanent location.  Well, although our house is no where near being settled, we are making progress.  I feel confident in saying that our shed is ALMOST 100% done.  I think we have some minor adjustments that will happen over time, but things are mostly organized into their space that for right now is really working for us (now I just have to put back all of the tools I've had out to hang stuff).  So yes, as you can tell, I have been a handy man, and so has my husband.  We have purchased a few items, shelves, etc. that are helping us to get organized.  Our office has been in shambles since we've moved in.  Piles of crap, then those piles of crap got organized into smaller more organized piles of crap, then they soon became specific piles of crap, then they started to not look like crap anymore because we actually knew what things were.  Although at the current moment, we don't have the organizational tools for our office to be complete and all organized and PRETTY, we at least have things mostly organized in that room.  I spent ALL day getting it done.  What a great feeling that is to accomplish something that has been looming over your head for so long! 

Here is a picture of my almost finished work:  (It's finished now, I just haven't taken a picture yet.  The silver edging is now black!) 


 And it's in perfect timing, my in-laws are coming this weekend to bring us more CRAP!  HAHA!  We certainly are excited to see them, as well as good family friends who are joining them in the trek out this way, and of course we get our puppy back!  I am a little nervous that we will have to totally re-train her.... more on Kittlesby later in case you are curious... She's a special dog!  Another thing is that our pictures have finally been posted from our wedding day. 


In case you're interested:  
http://katebotwinskiphotography.com/index2.php?v=v1#/proofing/
password: Zaffke


Seeing them feels like we're moving on.  We'll soon be able to order pictures... (the ones we've already paid for of course.  I love you Kate and think your work is amazing, but I don't know if we are able to afford some enlargements... that's a bit high for our budget!)  Which means our picture frames will soon have pictures of the two of us, and OUR families, not just me and my world pre-wedding.  That to me says, we are finally becoming a couple.  I mean, we are, but I think sometimes it's weird learning to share everything, having two lives become one is a bit of a dance, and sometimes I don't feel like I'm actually married... weird, again, more on that later!  


So basically a lot got done today, and I feel like things are starting to fall into place in our house and with us as a couple.  We will continue to do lots of rearranging, hopefully in our marriage we're always looking for ways to improve as husband and wife, but I hope that we also learn to settle in.  I like when things have a place to go, I like working hard all day and knowing I accomplished things, and most of all I like crawling into bed at night with my husband, snuggling up next to him and excited for what tomorrow will bring for us individually and as a couple (even if that is going to work...)

New Beginnings...

So as I am sitting here, my husband is upstairs playing on his computer. It is comforting to know he is here, even if we aren't interacting. Today has been a good day which is great because the past couple of days have been really rough. I had a job interview for a very part time job at a paint your own pottery store in Annapolis. Side note: I LOVE Annapolis! It is a really beautiful little city. If we are going to be out east for a while, I would like to someday move to this city! History, the bay, lots of dogs being walked, cute local stores.... ok I'll stop. Long story short, I GOT THE JOB! I will only get a few hours a week, but I am needing someplace to get out of the house and REALLY needing some extra money to pay off our astronomical bills! Oh the joys of marrying our debt! My interview was at 10am, they called at 11am and offered the job and I start on Friday. It sounds like it is going to be lots of physical labor, but something right up my ally- even if it is VERY part time! So I also was bumming about not subbing or having a job, and after coming home from my JOB offer, I get an envelope in the mail from a school district that has an application in there for subbing! Now an amazing story is that every other district in the area fills up their subbing positions the first week of August... boo wedding date we chose! So this post is to say that a woman who months ago had a very reliable job, days ago was freaking out that I would never have a job again, to now getting some leads to some work. Although, not quite the same as being in my own classroom, God knows just what we need to get by! AND, this allows me more time to spend with my husband since I won't be working ALL the time. So here I go to make dinner for us and to sneak upstairs and give him a kiss! What a great thing to be able to do!

I was at one point good at writing weekly blogs... thanks to Greaterworks.  I can see now I'm lacking the consistency aspect.  So many things have happened from where I originally saw myself.  Yet one more example of God leading me in totally different directions than what I had planned.  

In April I Moved back to MN to live with my parents after ending my time with GreaterWorks.  April Through July-  Lived at my parents house, subbed in Northfield, helped as an assistant coach of the Northfield softball team, dog sat for 3 weeks (had to put this beautiful dog to sleep while the owner was in Alaska-sweet woman and a really sweet dog!).  Once summer came my priorities were helping my parents get ready for a HUGE garage sale to help clear out my grandparents junk, I mean possessions.  I was able to do a little camping and spend time with a guy who was by boyfriend for these brief couple of months.  Come July I started packing my life into a small Uhaul trailer where my parents helped travel with me the 900 miles to my new home.  I took a job as a teacher at Marvell Public Schools.  I took the job not knowing what grades I'd specifically be working with, or really ANY details for that matter.  I did turn down a job in San Antonio after I said yes to Marvell.  I don't think this was my first choice, but knew it was where I was supposed to be.  I loved having my parents meet many of the people and places that had become my home last year and will be my home for who knows how long.  I started teaching in August and have been busy with that since.  I teach 7th and 8th grade art and a couple of remediation classes.  This blog is an update, not a look into my deep thoughts.  Soon I'm sure I will start sharing the insights of life at Marvell Public Schools....  Be prepared.  I took up my role as choir director again at the church I attend.  I have been able to visit MN a couple times: The Docken wedding in September, Thanksgiving (which the church was awesome and made this trip possible), and just short of two weeks for Christmas.  Soon I have some of my MN life coming down here and I can't wait to share my world and life with them.  I just finished up a musical revue at the college in Helena.  It was an anniversary show and I had my first ever SOLO!  It was super exciting to be given the opportunity!  I met a lot of new people which I'm really sad to not get the opportunity to see them as often.  

So this was rather boring, but for those who keep up and are interested, there you have it!  I have a lot of thoughts that I can't wait to share and get into some more great conversations, but for right now, I'm exhausted and need to get some beauty sleep!  

crossing off my to-do list

I am home in MN. It has been cold and snowy. I at one point in life was very proud of it being cold, and used to love winter. Now that I'm older, (or after living in the south for a bit) I am no longer a huge fan.

My question for me now is, "With everything I've gone through, and everything I've learned; why is is that now that I'm home I have yet to open my bible?" Now I feel ashamed writing this, but I also have learned this year that I need to be real. I spent a good 45 min. today writing a master TO DO LIST for things to do today, by the weekend, and before I leave for 'HOPEFULLY' Texas in July/August. Sometimes I get so caught up in I have to do this before this can happen. I know I do this a lot with my life. Before I can start running and getting in shape, I have to read tons of articles on running a marathon, make sure I have the right clothes-day dream about them because I don't have the money to actually buy the clothes, find the right foods to eat and the list goes on. Yet after doing all this, I have yet to get around to actually start training for a marathon or even running one! And so, because I haven't done it, I plan for the future. When my life starts, I will have these clothes, I will eat these foods, I will do this, and THEN I will run lots of Marathons. I mean heck, let's talk about my love life! I mean, ask any of my friends and they'll tell you I have my wedding all planned out, my job, my husbands job, my kids names, where were are going to live, what we are going to be active in...(ok, it's not that bad......ok...maybe I need help) but the point is, I day dream about it and feel I have to do this and that before I can let it happen. I need to organize this part of my life before I'm ready to get into a relationship, or I need to know this, or have experience with that. Again the list goes on. I'm the same way with opening my bible. I have to know the Greek roots before I can read the bible, or I need to have a meaningful worship experience to get in the mood to read the bible, or I need to have my room organized and not have that clutter hanging over my head before I can completely focus on the bible, because if I don't, I won't be able to focus on God's words to me because I'll just be thinking about everything I have to do.

You know what it all is: EXCUSES! How will I ever run a marathon if I just don't get out and run. Yeah, maybe today I'll be able to only go 24 minutes, and 20 the next. But isn't that better than sitting around doing NOTHING? Won't it get me that much closer? And how about a relationship. Don't I have to be comfortable with myself and everything I don't have to offer (and of course the things I do have to offer: I think I have lots...) before I'm going to let a guy truly into sharing a life with me? And if these are true, why do I think God is any different? He calls us where we are at. Isn't 5 minutes spent in his word better than none? And really...shouldn't he be my priority? Why do I think I can run a marathon or find a man to share life and love with if I don't have life, love and endurance from the source of it all?

So although I'm not saying I'm going to stop being productive, I'm going to look at the source of why I feel the need to have to cross things off a nice big list. And hopefully I will have the strength to to put something on my list that can never be crossed off: spending time learning about God's infinite love for me!

For those of you who are actually reading both blogs, sorry for not updating this in a long time! Things have been crazy. Living in a community and actually being intentional is WAY harder than it sounds. Now I thought, I've lived with roomates, I did the whole college thing, totally easy....I was wrong. I'm learning how to truly love my house mates and how I can best serve them, even when I REALLY don't want to. When really what I want to do is shut myself in my room and know that I'm right, God calls me to be different. To be open, to share my struggles, my fears, my joys. This has not come without a lot of pouting and crying and wanting to be by myself, live on my own, live where all that matters is me. But God calls us to a different life. Bonhoffer(sorry I don't know how to spell his name) in his book, Life Together, has been challenging me. God called us to live in community. Our western world has gotten so far away from the word community, we don't really know what it means anymore. I still don't get it and want to run away from it, but I know there is a reason God created Eve so Adam would not be alone. Prayer, praise, psaltery, breaking bread....TOGETHER....if we really actually learned to live this way, don't you think some of the injustices that I see in this community would be gone? We would not complain that our food isn't cooked to our liking, or didn't come fast enough, because we would see that our brother has none on his plate at all. We would read the Psalms and realize that although we do not feel the deep despair and hurt of war and loss, that our brother is still today in another country. We would want to come home at the end of the day and praise God together and hear what he has been doing in each others lives. I know I wish that I could truly understand this...I still fail. But I'm trying, I'm trying to be intentional. Even the days when I am defiantly NOT trying, I am still trying and learning that God calls us to live a life in communion with one another!

I am starting to think about the upcoming year(I have a Job interview lined up which I am SUPER excited about). I am tempted to be excited about getting back to ME. Live in an apartment by myself, cook food my way, pray the way I want to pray, tell jokes that make me laugh...well yes, none of these things are bad that I desire them, I should want to do all of these things, but it's only half of my whole. I am made to live in community. I hope that I will get to live with my best friends and that we can learn to praise God together, read his word together, eat bread together, and through that we will want to take that out into the world. Where it starts at home, then it will continue to flow through us. This is my hope....

Sorry if these thoughts are jumbled, I just needed to write them down and share with you since I haven't done a very good job! Though, if you do read this you should check out www.greaterworks.us because I do a better job of writing weekly reflections there!

photo update continued

My last one didn't want to take all the pictures, even though it's only 2 more!!

Nate, Rachel and I on Beale St. in Memphis, TN

Our team all dressed up for Bruce and Debbie Haye's Wedding.
L to R: Jody, Rachel, Tiffany, Myself and Nate

So although this isn't everything it's a good look into some of the things that I have been experiencing here. If you would like to financially support me, I am in the process of creating my support team to help me raise $3,500 for the year. Feel free to go to greaterworks.us and click on my name where you can read other reflections and then click on the link to financially support me! I would love to hear what is new with those who actually read this!!

Pictre Update

So hopefully some of you are reading my blogs at the greaterworks.us website. There I keep weekly reflections of things that I am learning and things that God is showing me. Because of it though I haven't actually spent some time updating this one! So I'm going to kind of do a picture update....

This is our beautiful home that the 5 of us live in. It is the parsonage
to the United Methodist Church.

This is the damage that I did to the car port at the church with the
Lexa God's Kids bus. I also broke off the emergency hatch on the bus!
It's all fixed up now!!

This is a beautiful flower. I was told the name, but I already forgot!
But it grows wild in a lot of places!

This is my team in a cotton field. I now know a lot about the cotton process.
If you want to know, I would love to share!
L to R: Nate, Tiffany, Jody, Myself and Rachel

This is at the Blues Festival in Helena! Pretty exciting! Lots of GREAT music!