I HEART my nephew!!!

Ok, I love babies.  I have been so excited for all of my friends who have had babies.  I can't wait to have my own babies.  I Love them....

but then my nephew was born....

I have only seen pictures of him and I already can't take my eyes off him.  My husband has had to take my phone away so I stop looking at the ONE picture I was sent!  (Luckily, my sister sent me a few more now....)  Is it possible to be SOO in love with a human being I haven't even met yet?  Is it because I have known my brother his whole life, grown up with him, had him bully me, cried in middle school when another kid told me he (my brother) made a mistake in football, watched him struggle, watched him overcome, have always been SOO proud of HIM?  Then talk about my sister-in-law.... can we just take the word in-law out.  I have adored her since my brother first brought her home!  She is so strong and so kind, and so willing to listen.  So there are these two people that I care SOO deeply for that just created a baby.  Is this why I am so in love with him already (without meeting him!!)??  

It is crazy!  I think he is the cutest baby (again, only seen a few pictures...), and I just have such a connection to this little guy (I HAVEN'T EVEN MET HIM......)

Wow, I wonder what it's like to be a parent?  My brother and "sister" must be exploding with emotions for this little guy!!  Welcome to our world TD!  You are already loved by so many!  I can't wait to meet you!!

Bekki

I have moved HOW many times???

Ok, so I am a little in shock....  When I would tell people how many times I had moved I would EXAGGERATE and say I had moved EVERY YEAR since I left for college...

It was NOT an exaggeration...  in fact, it wasn't even close to the truth.  I have had to fill out some intense paper work to get my government job at the Child and Youth Development center on base.  (They want to make sure I am who I say I am, and that I'm not some creepster- I totally think it stinks to go through the process, but am totally a fan that they are trying to protect children!!!)  We had to go back 7 years and report where we have lived and worked... I have moved 16 times in the past 7 years.... SIXTEEN!!!  That's more than twice a year!  (and that doesn't even count some of my small moves where I moved all my stuff to my parents house for a couple weeks before I moved in to my "permanent" location!



Let's take a glimpse at pictures from SOME of my locations....

This is Beth, James and I in the apartment I lived in during my senior year of college.  I had to move because of excessive flooding on multiple occasions!!

So I moved in with my parents for a few months.

And we organized one of their rooms!

Then I moved in with my brother and sister-in-law.  Probably my favorite house...

Then I moved in with a friend, only to get a job a MONTH later... woo hoo for moving for a MONTH of living...

Then I moved here (after living in Denver for a summer, and with my parents for a couple weeks...)

Marvell, AR with 4 others in this house... pretty sweet living accommodations...

Then I moved back home with my parents for a few months.  Here with my mom, dad, sister, aunt and cousins from OR.  

With my parents on move in day BACK to Marvell, AR where I lived above a wonderful woman from church.

Then I was SUPER LUCKY and got to move back to the parsonage while I worked at the church in Marvell.... remember 5 people used to live in this house?  Now it was just me!!!

 Yes, NOT taken during SUMMER....



 Then my summer before I got married I split time between my parents house and my "future" in-laws house- technically lived at home, but man, I can say I pretty much lived at the Zaffke's too!


Then we got married and we moved here.  Where I am NOW...

Ok, our front porch, not the whole house.  

We didn't have a house when we left Minnesota.  There I was a new bride, my belongings shoved either in storage, my parents house, Andrew's parents house or our car, and heading out on a drive to a place I did not have a place to live.  Talk about completely putting my life in someone else's hands!

I feel like millions of lessons could be shared here, but I'm not going to.  I'm not going to divulge into the meaning behind Matthew 6:19, "Don't store up treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal".  Nor am I going to share with you the tricks to packing and moving. (Mostly because I'm still horrible and the only advice I have is to never buy a sofa sleeper... they're really heavy!!)   I'm also not going to tell you how I fail at Matthew 10:10 because I have way too much stuff...

Ok, maybe a little on the last one.  It just really got me thinking.  I HAVE moved a lot, and because I am in the military lifestyle now I'm probably going to move a lot more.  Therefore, why do I keep so much stuff????  With all these blogs I have been reading lately I really have been bit by the bug of de-clutter!!  I want to keep ONLY what is useful and what ADDS to our life.  Too much stuff weighs us down, keeps us feeling stressed, gives us more to clean and STAY organized.  How much happier will I be if I only keep things that are necessary and everything has a place.  (How much easier will moving be??)  I will no longer have to have the box (ok, boXES) that has JUNK that has no place or home and have no idea what to do WITH it!  If I don't have a place for it, a) why do I keep it and b) why do I take it with me??

So, I am not done with my thank you notes yet, but I am determined to start this de-clutter!  So I am starting the challenge on Monday May 2, 2011.  I know, it's a long time off... but if I have a set date, then it starts in my head.  So mark your calendars!!!!  MAY is the month to de-clutter!  And between now and then, find small projects here and there to help you out.  Maybe you start looking for storage solutions.  Maybe you find ONE thing a day to donate between now and then.  I am going to write thank you notes, which will be a HUGE stress taken out when I get them done!  I hope you find your stress that you can master between now and MAY 2nd!  

-Bekki 

Who's up for a challenge?

Alright... I'm spreading the word....

I ran across an incredible blog:

http://simplemom.net/

about the blog

Simple Mom is a productivity blog for home managers. If we want to get things done and be fully present for all the things that are most important to us, we have to keep things simple. This blog is a catalog of the resources, tips, and lessons to make that happen.

When we find solutions for cutting everyday life clutter, we’re taking care of our family, our home, and ourselves. I believe that when Mom (Dad, too) is doing well, the whole family thrives

(Taken directly from Simplemom.net)

I fell in love at first glance!

In this blog the incredible author has started a challenge... (ok, she started it weeks ago, but I just found it!) Picking a "hot spot" as she calls it to clean/organize for the week.  She gives tips and guidelines and how to's so as not to get frustrated.  Then she has everyone link up their before and after pics.  (VERY encouraging)  Now of course, we totally missed ALL the deadlines for this, but I still want to do it!  So I thought... who wants to join me?  I'll send links to you to her site for the specific "hot spot" for the week and we'll go in the order she put them in!  Then we can share photos with each other, or just call each other and share about our progress so as to encourage each other!

I'm spreading the word now.  I HAVE HAVE HAVE to finish our wedding thank you notes before I can begin this.  But I thought I'd put the word out and get people interested!  I have at least 2 weeks without a job, so perfect time to finish up all our wonderful thank you notes (If you came to our wedding and haven't received a thank you note yet, don't fret... we are EXTREMELY grateful, and out lack of getting them out in a timely manner does not change this fact!

So who's in?  Who wants to get parts of their house clean and organized FOR GOOD!!  (Well maybe not for good but at least a good start!)

Here is some motivation... as you can see we are not at the organized stage yet... (Look in the background...)

Have a Happy Monday!!

-Bekki

Truly reveling in 'here's to tomorrow'

Thanks to everyone who responded to my last blog!  Even though I didn't respond right away, I read your comments over and over!  A) It was so nice to hear from some of you and B) You made some really good points and I had to re-read them to remind myself of the truth they hold.  But now onto tomorrow.  Yes.  I will ALWAYS have days where wasting away the whole day WILL happen.  (It has many times already.)  But instead of beating myself up, I'm going to focus on what's PAST that day, or days, (or maybe even a whole week wasted....)  


To start with some AMAZING news!!  Some of you may know that I have struggled with my 'current' job.  I work a lot of nights/weekends/days-which at first glance is nice and needed to help pay the bills. BUT I was not making very much money AT ALL, drove a really long way, so wasted a lot of money on gas, AND I rarely got to see my husband.  In Duet. 24:5 (I'm not a history or biblical major so if someone reading would like to confirm or deny my accusations with facts.... feel free to put me in my place!) a man and woman would take their whole first year of marriage away from 'normal' life activities, i.e., a man would not go to battle. 

"If a man has recently married, he must not be sent to war or have any other duty laid on him.  For one year he is to be free to stay at home and bring happiness to the wife he has married"

So, although we can't take a whole year off to focus on each other, I did think that we should at least have weekends every now and again to focus on each other.  So at the beginning of the month, I let my boss know that I would be leaving on March 31.  TODAY!  Great!  Thought I could find a job by then...


we waited...


and waited...


and waited....


(mind you that I applied for a new job weeks before giving my 'two weeks notice')


Z was starting to freak out.  (ok, me too...)  How are we going to afford bills?  Will we have money to pay for groceries?  (Another post later about finances-which we are NOT living the stress-free life in...)  So anyway, the good stuff you're waiting for....


I got home yesterday from work and got an e-mail saying they would like me to set up a time for an interview!!  I called this morning and have an interview on Monday!  Talk about living by faith.  God always knows what we need, even if it's not how and when we think we need it.  And although I like to plan everything, God is really showing me that I need to give that up!  Heck, I married into the Military.  I really AM being tested.  This job was another example.  Although I don't have the job yet, at least I have a possibility when that possibility seemed so meek just a couple days ago.  


So just know if you are impatient like me, or freaking out about an upcoming change in your life, or the change is SOO unclear, know that God would really like you to turn your concerns to him.  Even if you aren't used to talking with him, or you're BFF's, he listens and the best part: he cares and generally has a plan-just be aware you may find out your plans and His and different, but STILL good!  Ok, I didn't mean to end up preaching...  Just excited to see some benefits of not having complete control over my life!

I think I can do more...

So I don't know if I am the only person who struggles with this, but I kick myself daily because of it.  I always have big plans to do for the day and then 9:00pm rolls around and I somehow realize that I haven't even done half of the things I wanted to do.  Sometimes (ok if i'm honest sometimes is more like most of the time) it's because I get distracted by catching up with my DVR programs, or waste my time seeing what my friends are up to on facebook, or reading yet another blog of something else I WANT to accomplish.  Sometimes it's because the time just goes by way too quickly or I get sidetracked by cleaning something so unimportant... like rearranging my marker drawer instead of cleaning off my desk!  No one sees inside my marker drawer, so why don't I do the more important tasks first?  So then I get even more frustrated that I haven't done the things I NEEDED to get done or the things that I would LIKE to do-like paint or create something for a friend.  And then when I realize that I've somehow wasted away another day I get frustrated, and then realize I have twice as much to do the next day.  Now most people then work extra hard to complete their tasks... I'm not most people.  Somehow when my to-do-list gets over my head I panic and basically lock up.  That means the next day I don't even want to get out of my pajamas, all I want to do is crawl onto the couch and waste MORE of the day.  If I miraculously have a productive day, then the next day I can't wait to wake up, make a full hearty breakfast for my husband, do a quick load of laundry, make the bed-and my day has already been more productive than other days.  Why is this?  Is this just me?  I'm sure there has to be something out there to help me get out of this horrible rut.  But I bet that I could waste a whole day searching through blogs for an answer.  Maybe there is a solution that someone has found to get out and STAY out of this rut.  I'd LOVE to hear it.  I think another thing that I have to realize is that I CAN'T  do it all.  I want to be the best cook in the world, a super creative baker, keep a perfectly clean house, create lots of painting and sell my work, make cards to give to my friends, WRITE in those cards to keep up with family and friends, pretty much just make anything.... I'm already preparing for kids and the things that I could make them-like knitting cute hats and sweaters.  I think I should be able to do it all.  I haven't even been able to finish knitting a kitchen rag without it looking like a spaceship.  I can't do it all.  And sometimes I get sidetracked.  There.  I said it.  Maybe my first step to overcoming this problem is to admit I have one!  And of course, if there is ANYONE who reads my crazy ramblings and you have a solution, I'd MORE than love to hear it!!!

So although this picture isn't really current, it is kind of how I feel... Beat up and sad.  This is actually from a couple of months ago when Andrew and I went rollerblading, and he "tackled" me at the end of our driveway.  I got a minor concussion and all scraped up.  Sometimes I feel like my days tackle me more than I tackle them.  Would love your thoughts and opinions on how to turn this table around and I can be the one tackling the day!

Ahh, the joys of days off...

So as I sit here in silence (rare for me to do, I tend to like noise) I feel like things are starting to fall into place.  As you know moving takes FOREVER to get settled in to a new house.  You have to find new niches for everything.  You try it one way, and realize it totally doesn't work having it there, and you rearrange it multiple times before you settle on it's permanent location.  Well, although our house is no where near being settled, we are making progress.  I feel confident in saying that our shed is ALMOST 100% done.  I think we have some minor adjustments that will happen over time, but things are mostly organized into their space that for right now is really working for us (now I just have to put back all of the tools I've had out to hang stuff).  So yes, as you can tell, I have been a handy man, and so has my husband.  We have purchased a few items, shelves, etc. that are helping us to get organized.  Our office has been in shambles since we've moved in.  Piles of crap, then those piles of crap got organized into smaller more organized piles of crap, then they soon became specific piles of crap, then they started to not look like crap anymore because we actually knew what things were.  Although at the current moment, we don't have the organizational tools for our office to be complete and all organized and PRETTY, we at least have things mostly organized in that room.  I spent ALL day getting it done.  What a great feeling that is to accomplish something that has been looming over your head for so long! 

Here is a picture of my almost finished work:  (It's finished now, I just haven't taken a picture yet.  The silver edging is now black!) 


 And it's in perfect timing, my in-laws are coming this weekend to bring us more CRAP!  HAHA!  We certainly are excited to see them, as well as good family friends who are joining them in the trek out this way, and of course we get our puppy back!  I am a little nervous that we will have to totally re-train her.... more on Kittlesby later in case you are curious... She's a special dog!  Another thing is that our pictures have finally been posted from our wedding day. 


In case you're interested:  
http://katebotwinskiphotography.com/index2.php?v=v1#/proofing/
password: Zaffke


Seeing them feels like we're moving on.  We'll soon be able to order pictures... (the ones we've already paid for of course.  I love you Kate and think your work is amazing, but I don't know if we are able to afford some enlargements... that's a bit high for our budget!)  Which means our picture frames will soon have pictures of the two of us, and OUR families, not just me and my world pre-wedding.  That to me says, we are finally becoming a couple.  I mean, we are, but I think sometimes it's weird learning to share everything, having two lives become one is a bit of a dance, and sometimes I don't feel like I'm actually married... weird, again, more on that later!  


So basically a lot got done today, and I feel like things are starting to fall into place in our house and with us as a couple.  We will continue to do lots of rearranging, hopefully in our marriage we're always looking for ways to improve as husband and wife, but I hope that we also learn to settle in.  I like when things have a place to go, I like working hard all day and knowing I accomplished things, and most of all I like crawling into bed at night with my husband, snuggling up next to him and excited for what tomorrow will bring for us individually and as a couple (even if that is going to work...)

New Beginnings...

So as I am sitting here, my husband is upstairs playing on his computer. It is comforting to know he is here, even if we aren't interacting. Today has been a good day which is great because the past couple of days have been really rough. I had a job interview for a very part time job at a paint your own pottery store in Annapolis. Side note: I LOVE Annapolis! It is a really beautiful little city. If we are going to be out east for a while, I would like to someday move to this city! History, the bay, lots of dogs being walked, cute local stores.... ok I'll stop. Long story short, I GOT THE JOB! I will only get a few hours a week, but I am needing someplace to get out of the house and REALLY needing some extra money to pay off our astronomical bills! Oh the joys of marrying our debt! My interview was at 10am, they called at 11am and offered the job and I start on Friday. It sounds like it is going to be lots of physical labor, but something right up my ally- even if it is VERY part time! So I also was bumming about not subbing or having a job, and after coming home from my JOB offer, I get an envelope in the mail from a school district that has an application in there for subbing! Now an amazing story is that every other district in the area fills up their subbing positions the first week of August... boo wedding date we chose! So this post is to say that a woman who months ago had a very reliable job, days ago was freaking out that I would never have a job again, to now getting some leads to some work. Although, not quite the same as being in my own classroom, God knows just what we need to get by! AND, this allows me more time to spend with my husband since I won't be working ALL the time. So here I go to make dinner for us and to sneak upstairs and give him a kiss! What a great thing to be able to do!